I am a twin. For my whole life, I have been the edgy one, not the compliant one. I was the first to get into trouble and the first to lie about it. But I was born edgy. I don't know what karma I brought with me when I was born, but I found it hard to accept unfairness, and then adding to that was the unfairness that others didn't worry about how unfair things were. Like I said, I was born edgy.

While sick in bed with a cold the other day, I watched one of those reality shows about a big family. One of the kids reminded me of me when I was a kid. She struggled to be generous when her brother cut himself in on the game that she and her sister were playing. Her sister was fine with the change in game. But she was not. I saw the brother's innocent arrogance that he could do whatever he wanted and I saw the girl's struggle with the unfairness of that reality.

I wanted to take that girl's hand and reassure her. I wanted to tell her that her struggle doesn't make her flawed any more than being a girl makes her flawed. I wanted to reward her for the tremendous effort it had to take to be kind to her brother. It's hard when we are judged by who we are, and not by what we do.